I have been talking to more women about their marriages and how they are going. A lot of them have mentioned troubles or divorces at the nine/ten/eleven year mark(s).
Is it a societal thing? Do we get bored? We have instant gratification with microwaves, mobile phones, computers, fast food: are we looking for the quick and easy in parts of our lives which are not quick and easy?
I am trying to work on being less angry. It's hard. It's a very conscious effort.
I grew up Catholic and don't go to any church/denomination now. They had pre-Cana. Marriage classes taught by other married people. Like Childbirth Education only. I always laughed at how people took classes "to get married" and now maybe I am not so cynical about such an idea.
Love is blind but education may lift the gauze of the "smoochy" period of a relationship and provide insight into what you are really getting into.
Do I regret getting married? That is a huge question. Mostly "no" is the honest answer. I think getting married and then pregnant 2 months later has added to the stress level in our home. And then getting pregnant again 2 years after the first child probably wasn't a brilliant idea either.
I lived alone and supported myself before marriage. After getting married my life was turned totally upside down and quickly.
So, yes, some regret: maybe more on how things have played out. But these are choices I was a part of; no one forced me to do anything.
Kind of rambling today. Perhaps I have had too much UV with the new blonde hair.
In conclusion, dear reader, think before acting. All these books on "go with your gut" and "your first impulse is the right one" are not one size fits all.
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